EMS Christmas.


Sometimes I get bored on the ambulance. Even in the midst of running calls I occasionally have to cudgel my brain into focusing on the task at hand instead of meandering off on it’s own. Sometimes those meanderings bear pretty interesting fruit, and lately, I’ve been stuck on Christmas Carols. So not only do I blow the air horn in rhythm with my favorite carols while driving lights and sirens (Jingle Bells is especially effective) I’ve come to making up some specifically EMS related variations to the classics relevent to the calls we receive in abundance this time of year.

“There’s No Place like Psych for the Holidays
So if you’re feeling stressed out or alone
A strip search, bed, and gown are all yours for free
For the holidays theres no place like Psych Zone!”

“Tis the Season for Drunk Drivers
Fala lala la, lala, la, la,
Coming home from Christmas Parties
Fala lala la la, lala, la la
Hitting curbs and trees and fences
Falala, falala, la la la
Neighbors call the ambulances
Falalalala, lala, la, la”

“Santa Baby, slip a lawyer under the tree,
for me
I’ve been an awful good boy
Santa baby, and hurry to the precinct tonight

Santa Baby, a get away car with rims that spin,
I’ll wait up for you here, Santa Baby
so hurry to the precinct tonight.

Think of all the jobs I’ve missed
Think of all the people that I haven’t hit
Next year I could be on parol
If you check off my Christmas List, boo doo bee doo”

I admit the lyrics are pretty horrible, but they are entertaining to think up at work. I’ll post more if I come up with any additional. Any other suggestions on how to keep in the Holiday spirit at work without getting fired?


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